Article: The Academy gave out plenty of statues, we're giving out the busts.

Byline: Sean Piccoli

Before this year's Oscars came the first-ever "Fancy Anvil Awards," the Cartoon Network's inspired spoof of showbiz trophy galas. Anvils were handed out over the weekend in various categories, including best performance by an inanimate object. And no, Russell Crowe didn't win it. Oscar himself could have, though, given some of his more stilted moments in an otherwise fluid telecast.

Of audits and edits: With Arthur Andersen under siege, Oscar must be thanking his no-flake paint job that a virtuous accounting firm, Price Waterhouse, handles ballots. Now, let P-W audit speeches. Various people at the 74th Oscars gave us the ...

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