Article: ARNIE COULD'VE ASKED FOR GOLF CLUBS OVER THE PHONE.(Editorial)(Column)

I'm as tired as you are of reading about the Kennedy auction. All it proved was that my mother wasn't just whistling Dixie when she bent over my cradle and said, ``A fool and his money are soon parted.''

I am no better than the next fool in this department. In fact, while crazed spenders were beating each other senseless with $1,000 bills in Sotheby's auction chambers Friday, I was paying $45 for a bag of grass seed that had never even belonged to Jackie O.

Five bald spots in the lawn needed patching, and when people at home asked why I'd bought enough of the stuff to reseed the Yankee Stadium outfield, I said you could never be too rich or too thin or ...

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