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Article: MARRIAGE; Want to expand your life span? This Valentine's Day, consider . . .
- Article from:
- The Washington Post
- Article date:
- February 10, 2009
CopyrightThis material is published under license from the Washington Post. All inquiries regarding rights should be directed to the Washington Post. (Hide copyright information)
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MARRIAGE
(Matrimony, wedlock)
BRIEF SUMMARY OF PRESCRIPTION INFORMATION
No advertisement can provide all the information needed to
determine if marriage is right for you.
INDICATIONS AND USAGE: Marriage is the therapy of choice for
treatment of the condition of being unmarried. Marriage is approved
to manage the dread of growing old alone and missing the opportunity
to have dinner every night with a special someone, but without
talking. Clinical trials indicate that marriage is recommended if
you have found either a true soul mate or someone who has an
excellent 401(k).
CONTRAINDICATIONS: Marriage should never be undertaken in
combination with pending divorces, unresolved paternity suits ...