Article: Dear Friend, you have mail

Never feel blue again.

Start reading your junk mail carefully for a change.

The people who send junk mail really seem to appreciate you for the good person you are.

"Dear valued customer," one junk-mail letter might start.

You're valued by someone out there.

Even if you've never been that someone's customer before.

"Congratulations! You are one of the few select" insiders "who are eligible to participate."

You're one of the few! And you were feeling very outside till you read that.

"Dear Friend." You have a friend out there somewhere! Though that friend seems to want money.

"Dear Friend."

"Dear Friend."

"Dear Friend."

Three more people out there call you their "Dear Friend" in mailings ...

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