IN a novel by David Lodge, several professors of literature play a game of Humiliation. The rules are simple: the participants take turns to name a major work that they haven't read.

The more colleagues in the room who have read it, the more points the unread text scores. One lecturer scores maximum points when he claims never to have read Hamlet.

He wins, but gets the sack. A more accessible version of the game would substitute major works of literature with major holiday locations. Until recently I would have been invincible: how many people can claim never to have been to the Costa del Sol? I could never quite believe that the coastline of southern Spain had been even more ruthlessly ...