Article: Adjusting to a parent's new partner

Dear Beth:

You often get letters from adolescents who say they don't like their stepparents. You seem to advise them that this is natural because kids normally resent a new adult co-opting their parent's affection. This may be true, but the teen-ager may sometimes be right about his or her new stepparent. He or she may be disagreeable and/or may in fact not like the teen. It is not helpful for you to undermine these kids' natural instincts. People need to have confidence in their judgment about others.

I was a divorced parent who had this experience. I actually split up with two different men because my kids did not get along with them. I finally found someone we all love and get along ...

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