Article: Sarah Palin: Bridge to My Heart!

Sarah Palin is my homegirl, and I am not afraid to say that. She is one of the most gifted politicians of the twenty-first century and here are five reasons why:

Number 1: Sarah Palin is able to combat our neighbors in Russia!

If my sources are correct (and they are, 99.99 % of the time), our friends over in Russia are aching for a serious hurtin'. They seriously need to chill out (no pun intended!), and Sarah Palin would definitely be able to make those Russian Commies surrender to our tanks. I mean, she lives, like, right there. She can see Russia from her house! If that doesn't give her the experience she needs to combat our enemies over in that crazy country, I don't know what does!

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